symptom and cause
Shortened from Thoughts:
When looking at my parents’ home, it’s easy to become frustrated. For starters, nothing works properly. But there’s something that my mother has been repeating again and again. “One thing at a time…” Don’t try to fix everything at once. Slow and steady. And that helps.
I’ve recently cleaned up my parent’s “pacman” of an outdoor fireplace.
My grandmother, in her desire to make good use of objects, used the fireplace as a storage area…for trash. Since these pictures have been taken, I’ve tried lighting a fire (random dried up vegetation smells really bad), found out that according to physics the placement of the fireplace was unsmart, moved the fireplace, burned about a bag of papers and freaked out my neighbors with smoke. I still consider it a double standard that me lighting a fire is terrible but my neighbors having a barbecue is fine…
now are the dog days of summer…
…on the East Coast.
It sprinkled yesterday, in the City of Angels. The marine layer has been coating Los Angeles in mild, cool weather. It’s odd, and though I like heat more than cold, I’m not gonna complain about this.
It’s early July, which means, in “summer bum” lingo, that the days have started to meld together into a seemingly endless blaaaaaaaaaaaaah. Without the structure of work, the temptation to do nothing, in conjunction with my rather ADHD/OCD to complete tasks (GOTTA FINISH DAMMIT!) is not good. In particular, it’s not good because I forget to do important things…like check into my online courses…
Generally, though, I’ve been much happier these last few days. As some of you may have heard, I’ve moved back into my old room…and everything that my room has become. After I moved out, my room was first used as a storage area, then as my mother’s new office, and lastly, as my grandmother’s room. Office depot boxes, paper clips, medicated arthritis pads, a wooden backscratcher with a red tassel…some of the items are difficult to look at, and frankly, I don’t know what to do with them. I still have that sense of attachment to them, or at least a sense of reverence and respect.
For my own old possessions…to say the least, I’ve got to follow my own advice and “simplify, simplify, simplify.” Even with the help of my family, the move was a tough one because I had so much stuff. Just…stuff! Granted, moving from a condo to half a room (and corners here and spots there), this situation is to be expected. I still want to purge, cleanse, and shed.
So things must go, like the light catchers above. I made them, as an activity to do at my one and only childhood birthday party. It’s a good memory, and that’s what they will remain.
transition
Where have I been?
Well, when I started filling in my calendar with things to do during the summer, I realized how very little time I have to complete several of my projects. A week, if even. So I had planned to spend this week going through my belongings…recycling, donating, giving, gifting, getting rid of the excess in my life, the things that have been, literally, weighing me down.
And then I got a text on Sunday to head back to school, to work on curriculum for 4 days.
Don’t get me wrong. It was actually good to go back to work, to have conversations with adults, even arguments with my colleagues, and still support each other and respect one another.
Today, the work continues. Of the stack of binders, I’m keeping 4. It has been tough letting go of a few readers, papers, assignments. It’s like letting go of all the knowledge I’ve had on reserve, information that I can go back to. But the reality of the situation is that I will probably never go back to reading those notes, no matter how neat or organized or awkwardly meticulous they are…and they are. I think I pretty much have…had…a complete AP Chemistry curriculum. I am, though, going to keep one problem set from Calculus, just as proof that I did, at some point, know how to derive and perform more complex mathematical problems.
And it’s pretty to look at.
Happy Father’s Day
Happy Father’s Day, Daddy : )
On the first day of “summer”…
Though there are still matters that have not yet been completely settled, summer break is here, and for that, I’m grateful.
Time to start work on everything else!
Bread is rising, a calendar has been printed, gift has been bought and given, and “Pride and Prejudice” has been found.
